Ordering food online is always a challenge in a democratic family

Ordering food online has become a part and parcel of our life. The ubiquitous Zomato and Swiggy delivery guys running helter-skelter on city roads is a common sight. There are times when I feel sorry for them. They drive rashly just to meet the unrealistic delivery deadline their app company has promised. On one hand, the food, grocery, and delivery apps have made life comfortable for us. On the other hand, they have increased the volume of traffic on the road.

No matter what but food delivery apps have made life more tasteful for us. With a click of a button, you can open the app of any well-known food delivery company and surf through a directory of restaurants in your town. The list has some very renowned restaurants to some not-so-popular ones.

The process of ordering food online has become easier with these apps but on the other hand, it has created new challenges for mankind.

Ordering food online! What to order?

The biggest challenge while ordering food online is to arrive at a consensus. Ordering food online is the most exciting for the kids. Most of the time it’s the son who places the order as he is always excited about eating outside food. The elder sister throws her weight by being too choosy. If the son wants to have a Mexican taco, she will overrule him saying she wants to have a pizza. And if the family arrives at a consensus to have a Mughlai meal, then the daughter would ask for a Chinese one.

Mom is the most pliant and goes with whatever the kids settle on. She is ok with any meal until she doesn’t have to cook it. Dad, on the other hand, is always reluctant to have outside food. He prefers only homemade meals. But the kids ask him to give Mumma a break from the routine. He reluctantly agrees.

The best discount while ordering food online

Once you have downloaded a Zomato or a Swiggy app it means you have given them a backdoor entry into your personal life. They now have access to your online food ordering preferences and taste. Based on your history of ordering you are bombarded with emails and messages. They tempt you with discount baits that never work on restaurants from where you want to order. Similarly, it never works on weekends when you are in the mood to order food online.

However, every family has an Indiana Jones who will hunt for the best bargain while ordering food online. In my family, my son and son-in-law are considered specialists. The job of ordering food is always delegated to them. Whether a Pizza outlet is offering a 1+1 scheme or a Mexican joint is offering Tacos for a flat Rs 100/-, the specialists are aware of all such deals.

The order has been placed

Once a consensus has been arrived at on what to order and in what quantity, the specialists place the order online. One thing good about the app is that the entire process of ordering food online is visible on the app. From getting restaurant confirmation to food getting prepared and packed to being picked up by the delivery guy, all activities are visible in real-time.

The moment the order is placed the clock starts ticking and the digestive juices start working on the appetite. Dad who was the least interested in outside food is the most impatient and checks a couple of times with the kids on whether the food has been dispatched or not. Mom on the other hand is keeping her fingers crossed. The last episode of the food delivery company was an unpleasant one. The restaurant from where the food was ordered kept delaying the preparation ultimately leading to cancellation. Feeding so many hungry mouths at the last minute with the leftovers in the fridge became a challenge for mom.

Finally, the son breaks the news that the food delivery guy is on the way and will reach in ten minutes. Mom gives instructions to keep a little change handy to tip the delivery man.

Unpacking the food

The food delivered in a brown paper bag is warm. The unpacking doesn’t take much time as all the hungry souls participate in the unboxing ritual. The chutneys are packed in small plastic containers tightly wrapped by a scotch tape to avoid spilling. The butter nan and lachcha parathas are wrapped in aluminum foil. The butter chicken and paneer tikka masala are packed in large plastic boxes. The food is neatly laid out on the table along with serving plates.

The daughter asks dad to join the feast but suddenly a tragedy unfolds. The mutton biryani that dad wanted is missing from the order. The son checks the invoice and it mentions a biryani. Hell breaks loose and both the son and daughter get onto their phone. The daughter is calling the restaurant while the son gets onto the online food app and tries to find out how to complain.

I am narrating this based on my own experience. Most of the time while enjoying food along with family in a restaurant or ordering online, the dish that I wish for either gets deleted from the order list or is served last. My kids find this very amusing and I end up becoming a butt of their jokes in every family gossip.

Speaking to the customer service

One of the most difficult tasks while ordering food online is to locate the customer complaint number. I think the food apps purposely want to avoid sharing customer complaint number upfront to avoid headaches. A food delivery company should realise that sharing a customer complaint number upfront shows how valuable the customers are to its business.

Finally, the son locates a number that happens to be a call-centre number. Alternatively, the app also gives a chat option for the complaint. My son opts for the chat option but soon gets frustrated with the pre-recorded replies. He calls the call centre number and after listening to the IVR options with a lot of patience gets across to a human voice. The guy on the other side is very apologetic and requests to hold on to check with the restaurant.

Finally, a solution is in sight. The restaurant will send the missing Biryani. But by that time the other items will become stale. So, the missing Biryani option is cancelled and a refund is initiated. Dad settles for a paratha with butter chicken.

The leftovers for the next day

Despite the missing biryani that left a bad taste in everybody’s mouth the family enjoys the rest of the meal. The kids help mom to clear off the table. Mom, on the other hand, is left with a hangover of what to do with the leftover food. She dreads storing the food in small bowls as they leave her fridge gasping for air. The kids volunteer to have the leftovers the next day at lunch. However, once the table is laid for lunch next day it seems that nobody wants to have it in front of freshly made home food. Ultimately the food goes to the maidservants.

The irony of the story is that despite the missing biryani the app asks the family to rate their experience. Now that is what we call – “Aa bail mujhe maar”.

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