The Best Indian Mithai: An argument that can never be settled

Indians love mithai and also argue about which is the best Indian mithai. Every state in India has its own special mithai. The mouth melting Mysore Pak and Payasam are very popular in South. The Rasgulla and Sandesh have been ruling the East since ages. North is known for Barfi and Kalakand. West celebrates Ganesh Chaturthi with Modaks and the Teej festival with Malai Ghevar. People’s love for mithais have made the boundaries disappear and today mithais have a pan India presence.

One fine morning a heated argument took place between the mithai community on which is the best Indian mithai? The whites always had the feeling of supremacy. Rasgulla made the first claim that it’s the most popular mithai. Therefore it should be crowned the King of all mithais. On the other hand, the black community represented by Gulab Jamun said colour should not be the basis to decide the best Indian mithai. Rather it should be the character. Gulab Jamun with thick dark skin but a soft-core was confident of winning the crown.

A meeting is called to decide on the best Indian mithai

The argument over which is the best Indian mithai was getting dirtier and riots were reported from several black areas. On the other hand, the authorities were openly siding with the whites as they were big Rasgulla lovers. The supporters of blacks and whites joined the riots. Malpua and Peda openly supported Gulab Jamun. Rasgulla meanwhile had a big support from Rasmalai, Chennamurgi, and Sandesh.

In the past, the two communities had lived in peace for a long time.  Gulab Jamun and Rasgulla had co-existed, sitting in trays next to each other in a mithai shop. Within his heart, Gulab Jamun had a liking for whites as it was best enjoyed with plain white vanilla ice-cream.

The mithai community was not happy with the riots and called for an emergency meeting. An invitation was emailed to all members from Jalebi to Ladoo and Rajbhog to Balushahi.

Jalebi gets entrapped in a vicious circle of death and drugs

The sweet Jalebi dipped in sugar syrup was having an affair with Immarti, the local star from Bihar. One fine day in June, Immarti just vanished from Jalebis’s life. The sweet loving people were in for a shock blaming Jalebi for Immarti’s disappearance. TV channels like “Sucking Public” were after Jalebis’s life. The News anchor wanted to prove that she had a hand in Immarti’s disappearance. Then there were news channels like “Baal ki Khaal Tak” who wanted to prove that Jalebi was innocent.

The government under lot of public pressure decided to interfere. A team of FDI was sent to investigate the matter. The Food and Drug Inspector discovered that Jalebi was not dipped in sugar syrup but in thandai made from bhang that gave a kick. The FDI decided to send Jalebi to judicial custody.

Kaju Katli from Himachal Pradesh

The mithai community was keen that the Queen of mithai should join the meeting. Kaju Katli was unique as it was made from cashew, unlike others that were milk-based. Being from the Katli community she was good in biting while the cashew origin gave her the power to chew anybody’s brain.

A newly built sweet shop by her was declared illegal by the authorities and demolished. Kaju Katli decided to approach the courts and managed to get a stay order. She sends her regret saying she will not be able to attend the meeting.

The Modichoor ke Ladoo

Ladoo confirmed that he will attend the emergency meeting of the mithai community. He was keen to settle the dispute on which is the best Indian mithai? However Modichoor had this habit of making tall promises but in the end gave everybody Ladoos. As a result the mithai community didn’t have much faith in him. In the past he had made a lot of promises in his monthly radio programme called “Mann ke Ladoo” but nothing concrete  ever came out of it.

Ladoo had a knack of understanding the mood of the people. He had used a promotion tagline ‘Ab ki Baar Ladoo se Pyaar”  during elections that made him very popular amongst the sweet loving people. Today any religious function or a festival was incomplete without Ladoo’s presence.

The Mithai made at Home

BaluShahi was another mithai that had gained immense popularity in Modichoor’s regime. He had played an important role in making Ladoo popular all over the country. People expected Balushahi to be sweet but he turned out to be sour for most of them. Balushahi recently suffered from a virus attack and was admitted to hospital. As a result he declined to attend the meeting.

Rabri gets an invite to resolve the best Indian mithai dispute

The thick white Rabri was a favourite of the entire sweet loving people. Rabri was pure at heart, compatible and friendly with all its neighbours. Malpua and Rasmalai were his favourites. However, Rabri recently had a skirmish with a sweet dish of foreign origin.

Next to the Indian sweets was a Chinese sweet dish counter. Somehow the boundaries between both got dissolved and as a result one of them intruded into the other’s territory. The Chinese Darsaan made of honeyed noodles with vanilla ice-cream got melted and started encroaching on the Rabri’s territory. It was difficult to demarcate the line of control between the two sweets as both were white as snow.

The Line of Control

The Chinese Darsaan started making a territorial claim blaming Rabri to be intruding into its territory. Rabri, a peaceful loving mithai decided it will not take any more lying down as it had an advantage over Ice-cream. When it came to density, Rabri was thicker than Ice cream. It was easier for Rabri to intrude into Ice cream’s territory and so it decided to push the Ice cream  out of its boundary.

The Ice cream started calling foul and wanted to settle the dispute once in for all. Rabri knew that the Chinese Darsaan came not only with an Ice cream but with the slippery noodles. A dialogue with them meant going round and round just like the intertwined noodles. On the other hand, Rajbhog came to the defense of Rabri and started a dialogue with the Chinese but without much success. Rabri decided to consolidate its position by thickening itself. Finally, Darsaan conceded defeat and decided to retreat.

The Mithais decided that black and white was an irrelevant issue in today’s world as every mithai had a unique personality. There was too much sourness amongst the countries and what the world needed right now was more sweetness. And to sweeten the world people needed every mithai.

To sum up the issue of which race was better was finally settled and the human race trumped over the petty dispute.

You can enjoy reading more such stories on my blog. Click on the following link:

Indian Sweets:  The Sweetness of Home-Made Indian Sweets

Indian Mithai: the sweets that sweeten our life

If you love Indian Mithai and want to know more:

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